Life in Denver offers a unique blend of urban energy and outdoor adventure. One day you might be navigating a busy project downtown, and the next you’re planning a weekend hike in the Rockies. While this lifestyle is rewarding, it can also bring its own set of stressors—from the pressure to succeed professionally to the frustration of I-25 traffic. Managing the emotional highs and lows requires a practical set of tools. If you find yourself struggling with intense emotions, anxiety, or relationship stress, learning effective coping skills can make all the difference.
This is where Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) comes in. It’s a powerful, evidence-based approach that equips you with concrete techniques to manage difficult feelings and build a life that feels more stable and fulfilling. You don’t need to be in a crisis to benefit from these skills. This guide will walk you through practical DBT techniques you can start using today to navigate life’s challenges with greater balance and confidence.
What Is Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)?
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is a type of cognitive-behavioral treatment developed to help people who experience emotions very intensely. The term “dialectical” refers to the idea of bringing together two opposites: acceptance and change. DBT teaches you to accept yourself and your current situation while also empowering you with the skills to change unhelpful behaviors and build a better future.
As a leading form of evidence-based therapy, DBT is highly structured and skills-based. It was originally designed to treat borderline personality disorder but has since proven effective for a wide range of challenges, including depression, anxiety, PTSD, and ADHD. It’s a practical approach to mental health therapy that gives you tangible tools to use in your daily life, complementing other therapeutic methods like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).
At Mountainside Behavioral Health, we use Dialectical Behavior Therapy to help adults build practical skills for managing emotions, improving relationships, and responding more effectively to life’s challenges.
How DBT Differs from CBT
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) builds on many of the same principles as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), but places greater emphasis on accepting difficult emotions while developing practical skills to manage them. Depending on your symptoms and treatment goals, a therapist may recommend CBT, DBT, or a combination of both approaches. If you’d like to learn more, explore our CBT Therapy, DBT vs. CBT Guide, or Treatment Approach pages.
Core DBT Skills You Can Start Using Today
DBT is organized around four key modules of skills. These are taught in a DBT skills group and practiced in daily life. Here are some of the most powerful techniques from each module you can begin applying right away.
Mindfulness: The Foundation of Control
Mindfulness is the practice of being fully aware of the present moment without judgment. It’s the first skill taught in DBT because it’s essential for using all the others.
“What” Skills (Observe, Describe, Participate):
- Observe: Simply notice your thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations as they come and go, like clouds in the sky. Don’t push them away or cling to them.
- Describe: Put words to what you observe. Label your feelings (“This is sadness”) or thoughts (“I’m having the thought that I will fail”). This separates you from the emotion, giving you space to choose how to respond.
- Participate: Throw yourself completely into the current moment. Whether you’re drinking coffee, listening to a friend, or skiing at Loveland, be fully present.
“How” Skills (Non-Judgmentally, One-Mindfully, Effectively):
- Non-Judgmentally: Notice your thoughts and feelings without labeling them “good” or “bad.” A thought is just a thought. Pain is a fact; suffering comes from judging it.
- One-Mindfully: Do one thing at a time. When you’re eating, just eat. When you’re walking, just walk. This is the opposite of multitasking and helps quiet a racing mind.
- Effectively: Focus on what works. Do what is needed in the situation to meet your goals, rather than letting emotions like pride or anger dictate your actions.
Distress Tolerance: Surviving Crisis Moments
These skills are for tolerating intense emotional pain without making things worse. They are your emergency toolkit for when you feel overwhelmed.
TIPP Skills (For changing your body chemistry quickly):
- Temperature: To rapidly calm down, splash your face with cold water or hold a cold pack on your neck. This triggers the “dive response,” which slows your heart rate.
- Intense Exercise: Engage in 20 minutes of intense aerobic exercise, like running or jumping jacks. This helps burn off the physical energy of anger or anxiety.
- Paced Breathing: Slow your breathing way down. Breathe in for a count of 5, and breathe out for a count of 7. This activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which calms you down.
- Paired Muscle Relaxation: Tense a group of muscles as you inhale, and then relax them completely as you exhale. Work your way through your body, from your toes to your face.
STOP Skill (For not acting on impulse):
- Stop: Freeze. Don’t move a muscle.
- Take a step back: Take a break from the situation.
- Observe: Notice what’s happening inside and outside of you.
- Proceed mindfully: Ask yourself what action will make things better or worse. Act effectively.
Self-Soothing with Your Five Senses:
Comfort yourself in a gentle way by engaging your senses.
- Vision: Look at a beautiful photo, watch the sunset over the mountains, or light a candle.
- Hearing: Listen to calming music, nature sounds, or a soothing podcast.
- Smell: Light a scented candle, smell fresh flowers, or use essential oils.
- Taste: Slowly savor a piece of chocolate or a warm cup of herbal tea.
- Touch: Take a warm bath, cuddle with a pet, or wrap yourself in a soft blanket.
Emotion Regulation: Managing Your Feelings
These skills help you understand and change your emotions over the long term.
Check the Facts:
Emotions are not facts. When you feel a strong emotion, check to see if your interpretation of the event matches the reality. Ask yourself: What is the event that triggered my emotion? What are my interpretations? Am I assuming things? What are the actual facts?
Opposite Action:
When your emotion doesn’t fit the facts or isn’t effective, act opposite to the emotional urge.
- If you feel sad and want to withdraw: Get active. Call a friend, go for a walk, or do something you usually enjoy.
- If you feel anxious and want to avoid: Approach the situation. Break it down into small steps if needed.
- If you feel angry and want to attack: Gently avoid the person or situation and try to understand their perspective. Use a soft tone of voice.
PLEASE Skills (For building emotional resilience):
This acronym reminds you to take care of your physical health, which is crucial for emotional stability. The high altitude in Denver can already impact sleep and energy, making these basics even more important.
- PL – Treat Physical Illness: See a doctor when you’re sick.
- E – Balanced Eating: Avoid foods that make you feel sluggish or overly stimulated.
- A – Avoid Mood-Altering Drugs: Use alcohol in moderation and avoid illicit drugs.
- S – Balanced Sleep: Aim for 7-9 hours of sleep per night.
- E – Exercise: Get regular physical activity.
Interpersonal Effectiveness: Building Better Relationships
These skills help you get your needs met, maintain relationships, and preserve your self-respect.
DEAR MAN (For getting what you want):
- Describe: Stick to the facts of the situation.
- Express: Clearly state your feelings using “I” statements.
- Assert: Ask for what you want or say no clearly.
- Reinforce: Explain the positive effects of getting what you want.
- Mindfully: Stay focused on your goal. Don’t get distracted or pulled into old arguments.
- Appear Confident: Use a confident tone and body language.
- Negotiate: Be willing to find a middle ground.
GIVE (For keeping the relationship):
- Gentle: Use a soft, respectful tone. Avoid attacks and judgment.
- Interested: Act genuinely interested in the other person’s point of view. Listen to them.
- Validate: Acknowledge their feelings and perspective. You can say, “I can see why you feel that way.”
- Easy Manner: Use a little humor or a calm, lighthearted attitude.
FAST (For keeping your self-respect):
- (be) Fair: Be fair to yourself and the other person.
- (no) Apologies: Don’t over-apologize or apologize for having an opinion.
- Stick to your values: Know what you believe in and don’t compromise your values to be liked.
- (be) Truthful: Don’t lie or exaggerate.
Who Can Benefit from DBT?
DBT is commonly recommended for people who experience intense emotions, emotional dysregulation, impulsive behaviors, chronic anxiety, borderline personality disorder (BPD), PTSD, ADHD, or ongoing relationship difficulties. Although it was originally developed for BPD, it is now widely used to help people develop healthier coping strategies across many different mental health conditions.
DBT for ADHD
Many adults with ADHD struggle not only with attention and organization but also with frustration, emotional regulation, and impulsive reactions. DBT teaches practical skills that help people pause before reacting, tolerate frustration more effectively, and build healthier daily habits. Learn more on our DBT for ADHD page.
Learning DBT Skills in a Group Setting
Many people learn DBT skills through structured group sessions where they practice mindfulness, emotional regulation, distress tolerance, and interpersonal effectiveness alongside others working toward similar goals. Group sessions provide accountability, opportunities for practice, and guidance from experienced therapists. If you’d like to learn more about our program, visit our DBT Groups page or read What to Expect at Your First DBT Session.
CBT and Trauma-Focused CBT
While this guide focuses on DBT, it’s important to recognize the foundational role of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. As mentioned, CBT is a structured, goal-oriented therapy that helps you identify and change unhelpful thought patterns and behaviors. At Mountainside, we use CBT to treat a wide range of conditions, including anxiety, depression, OCD, and insomnia. Our therapists guide clients through mindfulness-based exercises and exposure-based therapy to help break cycles of anxiety and avoidance.
We also specialize in trauma-focused CBT, an evidence-based model that is considered a gold standard for PTSD treatment. This approach helps individuals process traumatic memories in a safe, controlled way, allowing them to regain a sense of control and reduce PTSD symptoms. DBT and trauma-focused CBT can work powerfully together, with DBT skills providing the emotional stability needed to engage in deeper trauma work.
Getting Started
Starting DBT begins with understanding your goals, challenges, and the skills that may be most helpful for your situation. Our therapists work collaboratively with clients to create individualized treatment plans using evidence-based approaches. You can also learn more about our Treatment Approach, Meet Our Therapists, and Insurance & Pricing pages.
Is DBT Right for You?
DBT may be a good fit if you identify with several of the following statements:
- You experience emotions that feel overwhelming or out of control.
- You struggle with impulsivity (e.g., spending, substance use, reckless behavior).
- Your relationships often feel chaotic or unstable.
- You engage in black-and-white thinking.
- You have a history of self-harm or suicidal thoughts.
- You have tried other therapies without success.
- You are looking for practical, skill-based anxiety treatment or depression treatment.
If this sounds like you, DBT can offer a path forward. The skills you learn are designed to be used for the rest of your life, providing a foundation for emotional well-being.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is DBT an evidence-based therapy?
Yes, DBT is one of the most rigorously researched and evidence-based psychotherapies available today. Numerous studies have proven its effectiveness for a wide range of mental health conditions.
How fast will I see results?
While some people begin to feel a sense of hope and relief after just a few sessions, DBT is a comprehensive program that requires commitment. Lasting change comes from consistently practicing the skills over time. Most people report significant improvements after completing the full skills training modules.
Do I need individual therapy while in a DBT skills group?
It is highly recommended. The gold standard for DBT treatment includes both weekly skills group and weekly individual therapy. In the group, you learn the skills. In individual therapy, your DBT therapist helps you apply those skills to your personal life challenges and goals.
Can DBT help with depression and PTSD?
Absolutely. DBT’s focus on emotion regulation, distress tolerance, and mindfulness is incredibly effective for managing the hopelessness of depression and the hypervigilance of PTSD. It provides the stability needed to engage in deeper therapeutic work, such as trauma-focused CBT.
Do you offer telehealth services?
Yes, we offer telehealth sessions for clients located in Colorado, providing a convenient and accessible option for receiving high-quality mental health therapy and beyond.
Building Skills That Last
DBT teaches practical skills that can help you respond more effectively to difficult emotions, improve relationships, and navigate everyday challenges with greater confidence. Like any new skill, these techniques become more effective with consistent practice and support.
If you’d like to learn more about DBT or explore whether it’s the right approach for your needs, visit our DBT Groups page or contact our team for more information.